Life updates and then some: 1 year of being married

My husband and I share this common dislike for the rain. I said dislike because hate is too strong a word because we know that rain is important so we're cool that it comes every now and then, but for it to pour heavily for three straight days…that's a different story. But I think the rain is not really the enemy here; I've been to different countries and experienced heavy rains in there too, but it doesn't get as bad as our situation in the Philippines. Corruption, poor urban planning, and our disregard for the environment are actually the real culprits here; while it's going to take a while to solve the first two; at least we can change the last one starting now. It has been raining like crazy and I do hope wherever you are right now, you are safe, dry, and well.

While waiting for dinner (writing this on a monsoon- filled Sunday), I thought of sharing a rainy day article regarding some updates about my life and what I learned after 1 year of being married.

First, life updates: lately, you may have noticed that I've been skipping some days on the blog. I am dreading that too, don't you worry about that, but life's just so busy lately and my business is currently growing; that means more clients, more tasks, and more time away from the blog, but I ain't complaining because it's what enables me to blog! The money I earn from the business helps me keep this up and running! I've also been reassessing what to do with the other assets of The Beauty Junkee and deciding whether or not I'll still do the blog and video or I'll just choose one between the two. At the moment, I don't think I can let go of the blog because of its sentimental value, but running a business taught me that sometimes, the best decision isn't always the easiest. Let's see. But hey, this isn't happening anytime soon ha! I'm just sharing my thoughts!

In relation to the first update, you may have noticed that there have been some guest posts here lately; these are readers of The Beauty Junkee turned bloggers and I thought of tapping them to go to private events that I am invited to so that through them, I can still bring you the latest in beauty and lifestyle even if I'm buried under a pile of paperwork. Hey, if you're a blogger and would like to be introduced to the world of professional blogging, hit me up, alright? :)

There. Not much to share because my life is mostly centered on work nowadays and it's a bit boring haha!

Now let me share with you my thoughts after 1 year of being married.

We celebrated our first year wedding anniversary last July 29. To say that time flies so fast is an understatement. Next thing we know, we're already on our 5th, and 10th, and 15th, and maybe a baby somewhere in between.

How do I summarize thee, oh first year of marriage? I would say it's adjustment phase. We've had great times and an equal amount of sucky times too; we've never lived together in our 10 years of being a couple and after the wedding is literally the first time we'll live under one roof. At first, our ol' selfish habits as single people were kicking in and it still does every now and then, but I think we've made a bit of progress: Before, we'd wake up reminding each other that our stuff is all over the place then the next moment, we'd wake up reminding ourselves that it's a place we share and marriage is teamwork so whatever is lying around is our responsibility. So far, we are doing great, although I think we could be better.

Some realizations after one year of marriage:

1. I REALIZED IT'S GOOD THAT WE BECAME BF-GF FOR 10 YEARS FIRST BEFORE GETTING MARRIED. I'm the type of person who'll give someone three chances before I say game over. There are some things where my husband has exceeded that, but we've been together for so long that I can say he's the exception. In turn, I also learned that sometimes, people just need chances: more than three sometimes, but what's important is they're trying to learn every single day. It's also a relationship advice that I can give, if you're looking for one: be with someone for a long time to know if you can truly, madly, deeply keep up with them, flaws and all, before walking down the aisle!

2. DRAW THE LINE. In terms of tasks and responsibilities; it should be clear who does what and who pays what. In our case, my husband pays the basic utilities (electricity, water, laundry) and I pay for the seasonal groceries (no time to cook), buy essential stuff around the house, and do some of the cleaning, folding, and tidying up of the place because what he pays in money, I pay in time. I know I said that being married and running a household is a shared responsibility, but it still helps to have main responsibilities just so you have a system. Believe me, when you're finally running your own house, you'll be needing a solid system!

3. OFFER HELP. When I feel that my husband needs a bit of helping hand in the expenses, I gladly offer help; I even tell him all the time to let me know if he needs it. And he does the same too when he feels that I need someone to help me accomplish the house chores or cover for me while I'm away for work. Offering help is one of the best gestures of love that you can give your partner!

4. CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES. One of my favorite life advice and it applies greatly to married life as well. There are things that we do that irk each of us. For me, I hate it when there's an open door in sight and the husband most of the time leaves his cabinet door open and it's right smack in my face because it's on my side of the bed. I don't like seeing tiny things like socks and hankies lying around the house. I could go on and on and choose to wallow in these things, but from a different perspective, these are things that I could forgive and even fix myself so why harbor bad energy and ill feelings if there's no need for it? We're going to be together forever so I carefully choose the things that I spend time and energy on, and there are things that are not worth sacrificing my relationship for like a cabinet, sock, and hanky.

5. DATE EACH OTHER. We don't have a baby yet and yet, we find ourselves slipping into married life responsibilities that we sometimes forget to make time for each other, thus we made it a point to date each other often in a month; it's not optional; it's mandatory. Not making time for each other will eventually lead to a dangerous, precipitous slope in intimacy; we have to remind ourselves everyday that WE are more important than any task, the house, and our responsibilities.

These are just my main sentiments after being married for a year. So far, so good. I have still a lot to learn and accept, and I can't share my thoughts on the other things yet because we've just started! But my general thought about marriage now that I've gotten past the first year is that marrying your better half should be an everyday thing; to be honest, there were some instances where I thought of letting go (blame it on hormones), but then I choose to marry my husband every single day and I'm reminded why I'm here with him. That always fixes things for me!

Hope you loved it! I'd love to hear your thoughts about this. :)